"It is easy to hate and it is difficult to love. This is how the whole scheme of things works. All good things are difficult to achieve; and bad things are very easy to get.”
The other day at Spamalot I was talking to my sister about how horrible my mother is. Just, about all the bad things that happened and all that. My sister said something that almost made me cry, looking back on it now, it pretty much does make me cry. She was looking off into the distance as she said it, almost distracted, I could see her almost starting to cry too. Her eyes were just...full of pain when she said it. She said "I was always afraid for you. I always said that once I had enough money I was going to move into a place of my own and bring you with me...I still cant afford it..." it was one of the most meaningful things ever. I can't wait till I graduate. Im leaving and moving far far away. Something Trav said the other night stuck with me too. He didn't say it totally meaning something, but in a way it did. He said "You know. Despite everything life's thrown at you, you didnt become a complete loser." Hah thanks Trav.
After looking back on everything life's thrown at me. I think I'm pretty happy. I don't think theres one thing that I would have changed, only because if I had changed one thing, maybe things wouldn't be the same as they are today. I wouldn't be the person I am today. All the mistakes I made, all the right decisions, they all blur into one. There's not right and wrong in your past, only what happened. What happened isnt a mistake its reality. In reality there are no mistakes. Because it happened. You can't change it. Just learn to accept it and live with it. "Forget regret or life is yours to miss"
I'm not exactly sure where things are going... but I think I'm happy with the ride so far.
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